Love & Let Go - Farewell

What will a man do when he finds such a love? Confess it? Ask for consent? Take it towards its natural course for consummation? Treat it like everybody does? Nope. He feels an abundance of gratitude, for being able to feel such pure, unbridled love, for becoming emotionally alive, for being proved right in believing that it is possible to love for the sake of love alone.

Then, he feels respect. Respect for the Forces that felt it right to allow him to feel such bliss again. To feel that pure emotion of love that acted as a salve for his soul, healing his wounds and setting him on his path again. No matter what others said, he clung on to his belief in the truth of Love, and lo, he was rewarded for his belief and faith in love.

And then, he lets go that love!

Yes, he allows it go ahead on its path. A person who made one feel such an evolved form of love, someone who is capable of making one feel such sheer bliss is not to be confined and castled in one’s mundane emotional bonds. Such love needs to be respected, admired and allowed to flow unhindered. It is only the earthly emotions that demand satiation and satisfaction, not the ethereal ones. Platonic affection demands neither carnal satiation nor emotional affiliation. It doesn’t bind someone, hold someone down, try to possess and claim someone as one’s own, but instead respects, feels grateful for it and allows it to flow on.

The calm and cool breeze moves across the lands, gardens, gutters and jungles alike, meeting the flowers, trees, animals and the rest alike, carrying the source of life for all beings in this planet. Every time it caresses a fresh bloom, the bloom smiles at the breeze, gently waves at it and smiles with gratitude. The bloom never tries to capture the breeze and to keep it as its own. For, the bloom knows that it is not possible to hold the breeze, because the breeze belongs to everyone and everything. Even a tiny bit of breeze that is forcibly held captive will turn into stale air, smelling of nothingness, devoid of life.

The bloom also knows that its own grandeur is nothing compared to the glory of the breeze. The bloom is allowed to only feel gratitude for the presence of the breeze, no matter however brief that might have been, cherish the opportunity to be acquainted with the breeze and to bid farewell to the breeze on its free, flowing path. The bloom simply smiles, thanks and does let go the breeze, hoping that the breeze will cross its path again sooner.

Even if not, the bloom will not complain about it, because the bloom is now aware of the breeze’s presence, aware as to what it means to feel the breeze, aware how much warmth and life did the breeze bring into its existence. The bloom also feels happy that it was awakened from its slumber and was made to spread its fragrance.  The bloom didn’t after all send the breeze away empty handed. While the breeze brought the gift of life for the bloom, the bloom also did bid farewell to the breeze by sharing some of its fragrance with it. And, the mere thought that the breeze will remember the bloom, having felt the bloom’s fragrance, makes it an even relationship for the bloom.

Some blooms are just meant to let go! And, some breezes are just meant to awaken more blooms!

Love & Let Go - Arrival

It is possible to fall in love for reasons other than physical ones.
No, it is not.
 

It is possible to love a person without knowing anything except their traits.
Nope, not possible.
 

It is the original form of love to fall in love with a person without knowing their caste, clan, religious status, financial background or any other such mundane factors.
No, these are all essential details to be considered before loving a person.
 

It is possible to find one’s soul-mate, who is exactly as one sees in the mind’s eyes.
No, it is not, you are hallucinating.
 

OK, least of all, allow me to think that love is magical and supreme.
Nope, that’s a stupid feeling, you get married to someone and get settled before you turn mad with such thoughts.

Imagine living with such hopes and hoarse voices in one’s heart and ears for years together. Sounds like a curse? Indeed, it is. Such conflicts can seed self-doubts in one’s mind and make life miserable for one. Anyone who holds hopes about finding love is ridiculed these days. Just the same way someone who believes in a tooth-fairy is. Only difference is that one does not want money for one’s tooth, but just love in return for one’s love.

There are two choices that face such a trusting mind – either to give up all the hopes of finding true love and pure bonding, get to the ways of the masses and settle for something that is secure and safe, or to keep clinging on to such beliefs and continue being mocked by the vast majority that didn’t wait to find true love but instead took a safe bet with whatever thing life placed in their paths first.

While most minds choose the easiest path out, giving up hopes of finding love, settling instead for emotional safety and security of loyalty in life, some minds stick to their hopes. Like those little Japanese kids who still believe that if they love their doll truly and sincerely, those dolls might come to life some day or the other and start playing with them.

How blissful will it be for the child when the doll truly comes alive some day! The kid can happily cock a snook at all those people who ridiculed the belief, mocked the dreams and derided the determination. Similarly, imagine the bliss of the hopeful lover when he finally finds his beloved in flesh and blood - someone who perfectly matches every hue of his dreams, fills every crevice of his heart, heals every bruise in his mind and fits snugly into his vacant dents of his soul, all before he even thinks of confessing his love!

Someone who brings light and love into the barrenness of his existence, pulls him out of his mundane worries, gives a jolt to his slumbering soul and makes his life flow again! Someone that makes him feel love all over again, brightens his heart’s dark corners, makes him fall in love all over again, across ages, spaces and time, renews his belief in love, proves it to him that it is possible to love not due to appearance, caste, religion, peculiar traits, carnal sensations, the similarity in tastes and interests, but to just love for the sake of love, that mysterious force which is keeping the Universe moving for long!

To be continued...

Love & Let Go - Awaiting

Do you remember the first moment when you learnt that Santa Claus isn’t real? Or, the day when you learnt that the favorite soft-toy you used to cuddle as you fell asleep, or the small soldier that you used to treat as your favorite action hero, or that toy gun which made you feel so protected and daring, were all mere illusions, just pieces of many materials, to help fan the fantasies of the nascent minds? Or, the time when you learnt that animals cannot talk and behave as we humans do, as we have been always taught in all those childhood stories, which are nothing but ways of instilling morals and principles in us?

As we grow up, our toys, our favorite cartoons, our beliefs in fairies, our fears about the monsters in darkness, all of these get discarded. While being disillusioned about monsters and demons does not bother one much, the disenchantment about one’s toys, fairies and angels, does kill a part of us. All of us slough off that childhood innocence, like a snake sheds its old skin, to grow into adulthood. It is an inevitable process in the life of any human being. Knowing that the doll is just that, a doll, and never was and never will be a real companion is a pain that all of us need to face. But it is an unconscious process. As I once read somewhere, ‘we grow up in the space between two days - the day when we used to play with our toys and the day we stopped playing with them’.
 

While this pain or process is a natural thing, not all of us take easily to it. Some people just agree and let go simply, while for some people it is some serious eye-opener. Learning that it was not a fairy that exchanged one’s tooth for a few coins but one’s mother, learning that it wasn’t Santa Claus that struggled through the chimney, but one’s father that piled up gifts and toys near the Christmas tree, these are all things that can strip the fascinations off a young mind. But, some children do cling on to their beliefs, even as they grow up and enter into adolescence. And the ridicule that such believing minds need to withstand can be soul-crushing.
 

Imagine having to face such ridicule for many years, especially when one is an adult that still happens to believe in fairy tales? The only difference is, the person in question does not believe in tooth fairies or Santa Claus, but in the presence of one’s soul-mate.
 

‘Love isn’t all that great as you think of it to be’, ‘love vanishes after an year or so into marriage’, ‘there are no ideal relationships’, ‘you cannot remain perfect companions’, ‘there is no one called a soul-mate or a dream-companion’ – all these and more. Now, I am not here to argue in favor of celluloid-type romantic musings, because one does understand, as one grows, that love isn’t always about red roses, clasped hands, and walking into the sunset, but about ensuring that the bond does not grow stale, commitment does not turn into confinement, and one another’s presence isn’t taken for granted just because it is secured, and to value one another’s presence instead of treating it as a given, only to regret it when one of them leaves – for a while or forever.

To be continued...

Book Review – Indian Love Stories, Sudhir Kakar

What does the word ‘love’ bring to your mind? A red colored heart, lovers with clasped hands, gleeful smiles of youthful faces and flowers in bunches? If so, you must read this book. Not because it will augment your idea about love, but because it will make you see how large and different an emotion love is, different from what we have been taught about love repeatedly, in mundane, movie-type depictions.

‘Indian Love Stories’ is an anthology, a collection of 10 short stories, by contemporary Indian authors and compiled by Sudhir Kakar. Each of these 10 stories brings out the 10 different hues of love – some blue, some green, and some, grey. But each hue by itself will definitely paint a vivid picture for your mind’s eyes. A compilation of works by some of the eminent names in Indian literature scenario, like Amrita Pritam and Kamala Das, these stories are sure to tickle some nerves, lacerate some hearts and unleash some repressed emotions.

With no intention of spoiling the show for the willing readers, and with the intention of giving a glimpse into the vast array of emotions and relationships that go by the name of love, here I’d like to offer a line or two about each of these stories.
 

1.    The Empty Chest, Indira Goswami – Deals about the unfulfilled love between a poor woman, who is left to fend for herself in the absence of her errant husband, and her previous, upper-caste employer. What will be her emotions like, if she gets to know about his death, a decade after their separation?
 

2.    The House Combustible, Subodh Ghosh – Translated from Bengali, this story tells about a chance encounter between an estranged couple. A divorced couple get to meet by destiny at a railway station, on a lonely night. What will be the flow of emotions like? Especially when they are both married to some other persons and are headed in different directions now?
 

3.    Stains, Manjula Padmanabhan – Set in a foreign background, this story depicts the relationship between a rich NRI and his African-American girlfriend. The clash of cultures and the conservative mindset of the NRI’s mother form the theme of this story. A little raw and a bit shocking with the way the story revolves around what we Indians don’t even want to talk about – menstruation troubles of a woman.
 

4.    A New Triangle, Ratanlal Shant – What will be the relationship like between a husband and wife that have grown cold by the commitment, the feeling of security and the resultant ennui? What will it be like for a husband and wife, who have nothing to fear about losing the other person? Well, this story deals with it.
 

5.    Chastity Belt, Damodar Mauzo – If you are a person who works away from home for a major part of the year and stays home only for about a month or two, will you trust your wife to remain chaste and loyal to you? Especially, if you were a person who has had an affair with a married woman under similar circumstances, in the past? Well, this story deals with that dark side of love.
 

6.    The Game of Chess, Kamala Das – Written by one of the prominent Indian female authors, this story deals about a woman’s infatuation and attraction for her elderly mentor/family-friend. Not sure whether it can be called ‘love’, but Sudhir has made it clear in the foreword itself that he will be including all shades of love, so you can accept this story.
 

7.    The Bed of Arrows, Gopinath Mohanty – A bedridden middle-aged wife, physically withered but emotionally very much alive, a husband who has been loving and caring nevertheless, the arrival of a female colleague that seemingly fills the husband’s life with a bit of joy and happiness, the resulting emotional turmoil in the mind of the wife, these form the basis for this story. Intense is the word.
 

8.    Housewife, Ismat Chughtai – Deals with the many strings that bring together a woman who sells herself for a living and a pious shopkeeper who is averse to such people. Destiny makes her end up at his house, which she soon makes her own. Their resultant union in marriage and the travails thereof are humorously portrayed here. You’ll love this for sure.
 

9.    Weekend, Nirmal Verma – A man separated from his wife, but committed to be a good father to his daughter, and a woman who shares his life and bed during weekends. What will their relationship be like? Will she ever go back to him even after she learns about his abundant love and care for his daughter? I simply loved the style of writing, though averse to the mind of that woman. A lot intense, brilliant and breathtaking. You often need to stop and catch your breath so that you can understand the innumerable emotions that are packed in these words.
 

10.    The Weed, Amrita Pritam – What will happen if a poor rural girl, married to a man much older than her, brought up with the idea that love is a sin and a sort of allure caused by eating a certain type of weed, falls in love some day? Amrita Pritam, enchants with her simple way of writing in this story.
 

For someone who had never indulged much in contemporary Indian writing, this book opened up a world of new reading possibilities and introduced some brilliant Indian writers to pick from, in future. If you are a person who believes in love and its many facets, you will love reading this book for sure. For, each story will end up tugging a string from some part of your heart.

Book Review – The Missionary Position, Christopher Hitchens

There is a technique in building demolition industry - ‘building implosion’. When it comes to demolishing very large buildings and skyscrapers, which might prove to be time-consuming, risky and costly, they place explosives at some crucial, supporting points in the structure. When the charges are detonated, they destroy the supporting structures in the building, causing the top portion of the building to collapse on to the lower part. The huge weight falling from above, combined with the Earth’s gravity, makes the lower portions of the building crumble into dust, resulting in ‘implosion’, causing miniscule or no damage at all to the structures or people around.

Having decided to destroy the grand edifice called Mother Teresa, Christopher Hitchens has followed a similar technique. He clearly understood that to destroy the aura and charisma of Mother Teresa, he needs to place the charges in the very crucial areas of her sainthood, virtues and philanthropy and, lo, he attains his goal with impeccable precision.

He places the first charge on her sainthood. He questions the hurry shown by the Holy See to attribute sainthood to so many people in a hurry, along with the slackening of the criteria for the same. One of the miracles attributed to Mother Teresa is a photograph taken in poorly lit conditions that nevertheless appears so clear and bright. While the journalist Malcolm Muggeridge attributed it to the ‘divine aura’ of Mother Teresa, Hitchens dismantles the claim by taking the confirmation from the photographer that it was nothing more than the newly launched Kodak film roll that did the trick.
 

With the saintly aura sacked, Teresa’s staunch supporters and believers will then resort to her noble virtues, searching for some stable points to stem the tide of criticism. Hitchens hits out at it next.  He disparages her work of philanthropy, showing us that it was nothing more than an outwardly veil for the missionary work of a zealot with her own crisis of faith. He condemns the enforcement of three essential characters of chastity, poverty and charity on the patients. He criticizes the lack of amenities at the Missionaries’ centres despite the huge sum of charities pouring in from around the world, the senseless use of money for religious rather than medical purposes, the proselytizing rituals carried slyly at the deathbed of the people grimacing in pain. He uses the statements of past members and volunteers of Missionaries of Charity and destroys the praise for her ‘philanthropy’.
 

Having destroyed her sainthood, having killed her glory for philanthropic work, he then goes on to question her very integrity, wisdom and common sense. Her stance against abortion, siding with the Church, her accepting donations from tyrants and swindlers, despite being aware of their notoriety, her intervention in the legal process in favor of a conman that looted from the common men - now these are sufficient blames that can make anyone seem like evil. Then imagine what they can do for the reputation of someone like Teresa!
 

With the sarcasm and carping criticism that begin at the title – well, all of us know what is meant by ‘the missionary position’ – and end only at the very last word of the book, Hitchens has crucified Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu (Mother Teresa) on the very grounds in which she was glorified. If you are a Teresa-admirer – as I am - please don’t pick this book. He will make you go scurrying for cover, running in search of some straws to cling on to save yourself from the storm that could shake your very belief in her. He will blast the pedestal from your mind and will bring down Mother Teresa with a thud.
 

As Sunday Times rightly wrote about this book, ‘it is not looking good for Mother Teresa’!

Music Review – Jodi Bandhu Hao, Subhomita

Books and Music. I often choose them both based on interest. And, at times, by intuition. When recently one of the Landmark outlets in Chennai was being closed down, they sold books and music at throw away prices. Like a woman on the throes of labor, trying to empty her womb in a hurry and feel the relief, they gave away books and music for a fraction of what they were really worth.
 

Having had my fill of the books from the sale, I turned my attention to music. With all popular and classical ones having been sold out, the shelves were populated by CDs of unknown and lesser known artists. Damaged packs, unintelligible fonts and unheard of names - these were amongst the ones for sale. Suddenly I saw a couple of CDs of Rabindra Sangeet. Having been fascinated by a man, who is one of the architects of Bengali Renaissance, I always wanted to go through his works, though I couldn't still read a single letter of the Bengali alphabet.
 

Image Source - Google

With 5 CDs being given away for a paltry Rs.50, I had picked two of Rabindra Sangeet, one of a Bengali movie 'Naukadubi' and then one of a Hindustani singer with whom I had interacted personally. I was looking for the last piece that could make my 5-for-50 puzzle complete. And, then I laid my eyes on 'Jodi Bandhu Hao'.
 

Never in my life had I heard even the name Subhomita, that of the singer. Having decided to learn Bengali, I decided to pick this CD nevertheless, driven by the cover design, the radiant photo of the artist, and the possibilities of having found something worthy on sheer serendipity.
 

Man, wasn’t I justified?! It turned out that this music CD will remain one of my most cherished music collections. Being unable to decipher the meaning still, I decided to simply focus on the music and the voice. The music is of the kind that will remind you of the lush green farms of Bengal, glistening under the rays of the setting Sun, the flowing waters of the Ganges, the kids running around in joy and gay abandon. With the music composed mostly with the Indian classical instruments, the music elevates one to an altogether different emotional level.
 

And, the singer, Subhomita. There are innumerable voices that I have heard and enjoyed. But here is a voice that can carry you around on a journey deep inside the soul. She has the gift of conveying the emotions and the spirit of the song through her voice. The bliss, the pain, the joy, love, happiness - her voice conveys the mood of the songs in a pristine manner. When I learn Bengali and start comprehending the lyrics of these songs, I wouldn't be surprised if they happened to convey the same emotions that I am feeling as I am listening to the songs now.
 

Melodious music and a soulful voice - if these are the two things that you look for in a music album, if you're a person that believes in the ability of music to transcend the barriers of language and convey the meaning clearly still, if you're a person that agrees that the humans were able to communicate and comprehend properly even before the advent of languages, then listen to this music album. You won't be disappointed.

Krishna Janmashtami Wishes!

He was born a Prince but was brought up a herdsman
He was the Eldest of all beings
Yet he grew up as the Younger
He killed many demons and ogres
But salvaged a multitude of souls too
He was one fine Playboy with scores of sweethearts
Yet the one Ultimate Celibate sinless
He was the Righteousness that guided the Pandavas
And, the vicious Sakuni that guided Kauravas to their graves
The Epitome of Extremes, the Divine of Dualities
No wonder He remains rooted in my heart
A heart that is torn between extremes
Whether a god or not, He'll remain my friend
The one Friend that none can replace! <3

Janmashtami wishes to all!

Divine and the Details

Don't always go by the words of the so-called saints and gurus. 

It is not always necessary to shun to senses to attain the Divine. 

If the dawning Sun's golden rays, winter evenings' fluffy grey clouds, the sight of a fertile green field, the sounds of chirping birds, the song of a cuckoo, the smell of neem flowers, the fragrance of incense from a place of worship on the way, the cool sea breeze, a gust of wind on a hot summer afternoon and myriad such other sensations cannot stoke the Divinity within you, you're never going to feel it by dwelling secluded inside a cave.

For, it is not the Devil that sits in the details, but the Divine!

Happy Independence Day - 2014

Good morning, my Countrymen!

It feels nice to see the patriotic spirit flowing around, right from breakfast tables to profile pictures in social networking sites. But, let's realize that all our boastful talks of patriotism and profile picture changing is nothing, if we don't live it in the true spirit - the spirit of fraternity.

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 Just make a vow today to respect your fellow citizen and treat him/her as you'd treat yourself, to not cause hindrance to any life-form in any way, to protect the heritage monuments of this land, to not deprecate the past heroes, to preserve its natural resources and not squander them, to lead a clean, ethical and civilized life, and to be an exemplary beacon of virtues for posterity to follow.

Also realize that such a fraternity need not stop with Kashmir or Gujarat or Assam or Kanyakumari. Let that love spread across the oceans and terrains to envelope the rest of the world too. For, it is not love, if it does not grow and evolve.

If you think that these are all too much to ask for, then kindly change the profile pictures to your own photos, sit in front of the TV set and start watching the 'special programs', thinking this to be just another break from the senseless mundane lives that we are all leading.

Happy Independence Day!